Pregnancy can catch women by surprise. You start to think of your life before this positive result. There could be a glimpse of despair? But this is the miracle of life, right? How lucky are you to actually have made another life? Are you finding yourself pregnant and scared of life changing events?
Pregnant and scared of life changing Forever
The scared feeling of life changing while you are pregnant is very normal issue, and you can overcome it with proper communication, support, and plan.
Finding out you are pregnant should be a happy time right? But you could be wondering why am I so scared during pregnancy? Feeling robbed of happiness in pregnancy can be normal, your life has already started to change in so many ways, grieving for who you were previously is more common than you may think.
Is it Normal to Have Fears During Pregnancy?
Getting pregnant can be a welcomed life event or maybe you are caught off guard and not ready for those feelings of excitement? Either way, having fears during pregnancy is totally normal!
I can totally relate to these feelings of worry, shock and fear. My first child was conceived by what I now declare a happy surprise but at first seeing those two little lines made me feel petrified of what was about to happen especially as I was in the midst of planning my wedding.
Fast forward five years and we were buying our first home, then in true style I felt off, took another test and tah dah we now have a 6 month old.
I must admit the fears of how I would cope with being pregnant completely overwhelmed me, whether it was finding my wedding dress with a growing bump or whether I was able to do my DIY home improvements, that scared feeling unleashed a mountain of questions “How would I cope? What about my plans? Shouldn’t I be happier?”
Needless to say I soon learnt that my feelings were totally normal and being pregnant soon became a part of my plans.
What Feelings are Normal During Your Pregnancy?
As you start your journey toward mamahood your body is rapidly changing by the second to accommodate the life growing in your tummy. To support the strength of this little seedling your body is thrown headfirst into a tidal wave of hormones.
These lovely little chemicals are responsible for how we feel and react during pregnancy. In the beginning, many women may feel anxious about how their life is going to change after all whether you have just found out or have been pregnant for a little while seeing that positive result has already created such a shift in your mind.
Let’s get one thing straight, everyone has this idyllic dream of being financially stable in a lovely home with your partner, and creating a little family is clearly the American dream right?
Yea, in films and sitcoms this is great but in real life, it is not run by the same script and there are genuine worries that we women can feel after getting pregnant.
‣ Health
Maybe you are a fit and healthy woman who is hardly in the doctor’s office, then bam you are in a whirlwind of blood tests ultrasounds, and a rattling body of prenatal meds. Being pregnant can release the demon of health anxiety. Am I eating right? What should I avoid? How much weight am I gaining?
Then there is the health of your developing baby. So many prenatal appointments, recognizing movements, and high blood pressure checks. You could find that what was once a scary moment now has become a nagging feeling of making sure your baby is well and healthy.
‣ Finance
The number one reason we all worry! With the way of life becoming more expensive you could find you are just getting by yourself. How on earth are you going to afford everything that a baby needs?
As a mom myself, creating the perfect environment for the bundle you are bringing home was super important. I had a true vision of what I wanted but it was nowhere in my price range! Overcome by worry it made me realize that this glowing nursery was actually for me and not for my darling daughter, I felt as if I had to prove we could afford the same as the American dream.
‣ Work
This is definitely why many moms find themselves pregnant and scared of life changing. You may be at the peak in your career and maternity just doesn’t seem viable or maybe you are working endless shifts to try and make ends meet. Either woman can have concerns about the maternity period after birth.
Working industries have allowed women to become equal partners to their male counterparts, just because we women have the ability to create and grow life shouldn’t make a difference in the workplace but many of us feel it will.
‣ Friendships
The feeling of loneliness can appear when you get pregnant. You may have a tight-knit group of friends or an endless circle of social gatherings but with your body doing so much already are late-night drinks going to become a thing of the past? Will your friends truly keep their excitement when you become this new person?
‣ Body image
The female form nowadays depicted with how we should look instead of how we really look. Your body has been yours for so many years and now you are sharing it with another. This can pose so many unwanted feelings in an expecting mom. As your waistline expands you have a choice to embrace your new shape or hide away making your curves and new belly button feel shameful. How we see ourselves whether pregnant or not can have both positive and detrimental effects on our mental health.
Does Getting Pregnant Count as a Life Changing Event?
I am a firm believer that a mom’s life changes as soon as they get a positive test result. We ladies are put through the mill a bit when it comes to growing a seedling into a watermelon.
It starts with the pregnancy symptoms and whether you have sickness from the moment you wake up to the minute you go to bed or not your mind and body instantly change.
For males, it is a totally different ball game. They don’t have the feelings we have. They cannot feel the kicks in the early stages or understand your need for pickled chocolate so they are going on what we are asking from them. Of course, the financial worry could be very real for you both and the financial burden could pose the fear of not being able to provide for the family.
Anxiety and Depression Through Pregnancy
These are both very real and common for expectent parents. It is totally normal for you to have good and bad days but it is important to recognize the symptoms that could appear during pregnancy:
- Panic attacks
- Health anxiety- continuously worry or fear for your own health or your baby’s.
- Obsessive behavior
- Severe mood swings
- Persistent crying
If you have any of these symptoms that have lingered for more than a week or so then speak to your doctor, they can advise you on the best course of action.
How to Help the Scared of Life Changing Feeling During Your Pregnancy
Even though feeling scared is normal, check out the following ways you can help yourself during this crazy time.
‣ Communicate
The saying a problem shared is a problem halved is more true than what you think. Talking to your partner can help alleviate your feelings of uncertainty and help gain a narrative of why you are feeling so glum at what should be a happy time.
This allows your partner to release some worries they may have too. Once everything is out in the open you can make a plan and work through your feelings together.
‣ Support
Doctors, friends, family, and co-workers all have their unique way of offering you the support you could be craving whether you find comfort in the science behind your pregnancy or just want a shoulder to cry on and seek out your support network to help you on your journey.
‣ Plan
Planning your next step in your life can help your feelings of being out of control. Make a clear pathway of where you want to be in the next few years or what type of mom you want to be and focus on it. Don’t panic if you end up deviating away from your plan just make sure your destination is one you are happy with.
Wrapping Up
So is it normal to be pregnant and scared of life changing?
Absolutely
In fact, those feelings of being scared remind us that we are human. Getting pregnant and becoming a new mom whether it’s for the first time or 5th time is 100% scary.
Remember to seek support and guidance from those around you, communicate with your work leader, friends, and partner, and plan ahead for the new life growing inside you.
A new role, responsibility, and life awaits you and this can be a good thing not ruled by the darkness of worry.
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