Pregnancy is a bitter-sweet period for couples. With hormonal shifts and worries about the coming of a new baby, a good percentage of women are often sensitive to any unusual treatment.
They have high expectations of getting their husband’s support, understanding, and love. Unfortunately, men look at having a baby from a different perspective. Some start preparing their finances and have little or no time for their wives.
Are you feeling rejected by husband during pregnancy?
The article covers possible reasons for making your husband unsupportive and what you can do to address the situation.
Feeling Rejected By Husband During Pregnancy: What Could Be Wrong?
There are several reasons why your husband makes you feel rejected during pregnancy, such as fear of losing independence, financial stress, your divided attention, and the timing of the pregnancy. Additionally, he could be unsure about how to support you, or he is still in denial about expecting a new baby.
First-time dads may need more time to fulfill parenting responsibilities. Remember, some had an ugly childhood or didn’t have a father figure to learn from, making them fear becoming a dad.
That said, every man is unique. Take time to calm down before trying to find solutions together. Fights/ disagreements are normal during pregnancy, thanks to the hormonal mix-up that causes mood swings and sensitivity in women. Many men find the period overwhelming and may constantly withdraw from their wives.
The wife feels unloved when a husband seems unhappy, disinterested, distant, inconsiderate, and unavailable. While there’s a combination of reasons justifying the man’s behaviour, one may feel like the relationship is falling apart. Try to keep calm. Despite everything, you need peace of mind most during this time.
Signs Of Unsupportive Husband During Pregnancy
You can quickly tell how supportive your husband is during pregnancy by looking at several signs, including:
- Involvement- He seems less concerned about pregnancy-related issues, including prenatal visits and pre-planning.
- He’s distant and withdrawn – Your partner appears to isolate himself from his family.
- Your spouse doesn’t seem to care – To him, everything looks normal. He doesn’t show any excitement about any positive pregnancy developments.
- Ignorance – In most cases, your husband takes lightly the fact that you are in a delicate phase (pregnancy). He may seem unmoved even when you experience symptoms, including dizziness and nausea.
- Irritability – Your partner is easily irritable, unlike before. Additionally, he may not support any conversation without getting angry/emotional.
- Endless excuses – Your husband always gives excuses, especially regarding issues with the baby. For example, he may cite being busy at work as a reason not to accompany you for a medical appointment.
- Unavailability – He no longer has time for you and the family. Your partner is always busy with friends outside instead of being home when you need him.
Possible Reasons Why Your Husband Is Unsupportive During Pregnancy
Ideally, pregnant couples should be in love mode. With a new bundle of joy coming soon, women need appreciation, moral, and financial support from their husbands.
Every woman dreams of having someone to rub their aching back, provide company to prenatal appointments, and offer intimate hugs when she feels down in spirits. Though nothing could warrant rejection by a spouse, there are potential reasons that could make a husband unsupportive, including:
1. A state of denial
Your husband may need more time to process and accept that soon he’ll become someone’s father. This denial might be worse if the pregnancy was unplanned. He could withdraw to adjust his mind if you recently broke the news.
2. Fear of financial stress
Parenting needs resources. The thought of delivery bills, diapers, baby clothing, and accessories may leave your husband in stress. In most cases, when men are anxious, they keep to themselves. This may cause feelings of rejection in their wives.
3. Fear of losing independence
Fatherhood is all about sacrifice. You have to create time for your munchkin, and it’s not easy. The fear of not having personal space could be scary to some partners.
4. Worry about responsibilities
The man could be uncertain about meeting his child’s physical, social and emotional needs. Since he doesn’t know how to express his fears, it may look like he’s distant and disinterested.
5. Concern over your undivided attention to baby issues
Pregnant women spend most of their time thinking, talking, and caring for the unborn baby.
All these run through a woman’s mind, from prenatal visits to baby shopping to planning for the coming munchkin. This leaves little time/attention for their husbands, making them withdraw from their wives.
6. Lack of know-how
Unknown to many, a good percentage of men genuinely doesn’t know how to support their pregnant spouses. He may keep his distance to give you space during this delicate phase.
7. Lack of sexual intimacy
During pregnancy, some women suffer from low sex drive. This could make your partner feel unappreciated and left out.
8. Timing of the pregnancy
If your partner wanted to accomplish other career or academic goals before having a baby, he might not welcome the pregnancy at first. According to him, the timing isn’t ideal.
9. Previous pregnancy experiences
Your husband could have had unpleasant or traumatic experiences before that may cause fear and disinterest.
10.Extra-marital affairs
In some cases, the unavailability may mean your husband has a love affair outside that’s taking the love, interest, and support away from the pregnancy.
11. Depression
According to Pubmed, more than 10%of new fathers experience anxiety and depression during the perinatal period, but the condition is rarely treated unlike in the women counterparts. Your husband could be suffering emotionally too.
Either one or a combination of the above reasons could explain your husband’s rejection. Nevertheless, feeling unwanted by husband during pregnancy is a painful experience that could leave you in depression. Take it slow. Once you’ve established the root cause, finding a solution is more effortless.
If Feeling Unloved by Husband During Pregnancy– What Should You Do?
When someone supposed to journey with you physically and emotionally isn’t available, to feel heartbroken. That’s ok. While you can try resolving the situation, you have no control over what your partner does.
Try the following tips to help you relax and focus on having a healthy pregnancy:
1. Mind your safety
Avoid arguments that could escalate into physical fights while trying to find solutions. Keep safe for the sake of you and your munchkin.
2. Communicate with your husband
Hold a respectful conversation to find out why he’s reacting unpleasantly. Let him know how his treatment is making you feel.
Share your fears, worries, and expectations. Also, give your husband time to express his feelings and emotions about you and the coming baby. Let him know his value in your lives. Amazingly, you may come up with a solution together.
3. Safeguard your feelings/emotions
Occasionally, your husband may not be willing to change for personal reasons. Don’t worry. Keep your cool and protect your feelings.
No matter how he treats you, make an intentional decision to take things lightly for peace of mind’s sake. Remember, pent-up feelings cause stress/anxiety that may affect your developing baby adversely.
4. Focus on the bright side of things
To get motivation, look at the things already going well. It could be a complication-free pregnancy, a friendly working environment, or financial provision. Before you know it, your bundle of joy will have arrived.
5. Talk to a close friend/relative
You’ll need someone to share the intrigues of pregnancy without your partner’s support. Get a friend to confide in and get inspiration when feeling low.
6. Get busy
Shift your focus to doing things that make you happy. Do exercises daily, meditate, watch a movie or go to the park. Such activities will help you stay calm and relaxed while keeping negative energy at bay. Further, remaining busy leaves no time for overthinking.
7. Create a robust support system
Surround yourself with trusted friends and relatives that provide support. With an unsupportive husband around, you’ll need people to assist during and after delivery.
8. Seek therapy
Depending on unique capabilities, anxious thoughts could be overwhelming during this time. Seek the services of a professional therapist to help you overcome stress and anxiety that may weigh you down. You may also seek help together as a couple.
Rejection among marriage partners has detrimental effects on the relationship. Psychology Today confirms that a rejected spouse will likely develop anger and resentment towards the partner or depression.
Be open when trying to resolve this situation, and make your emotional health a priority. Additionally, do not blame yourself.
Wrapping Up
Pregnancy comes with its share of challenges. Aside from personal or health complications, emotional frustrations may leave you feeling rejected by your husband during pregnancy.
Hormonal changes, sexual frustrations, money worries, and fear of responsibilities are some factors that may make your husband unsupportive during pregnancy. You may try to find solutions by communicating your feelings.
If your husband isn’t willing to resolve the situation, engage in exercises, meditation, or other fun activities to relax and prevent stress/anxiety. Seeking professional therapy services from a counselor together may also help during this time.
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