When my last born clocked three months, he’d cry endlessly without any sign of sickness and cried more when I held him while sitting down. Funnily, the crying would suddenly stop on standing up, only to resume the moment I slumped into my chair.
That time I couldn’t understand why my baby won’t let me sit down. Are you also wondering what’s wrong with your little one? Inspired by my experience, I have compiled possible causes of a baby crying when you’re sitting and practical remedies.
Read on.
Baby Won’t Let Me Sit Down – Why?
When your baby cries when you sit down and/ or stops once you stand, it could be due to various reasons, including biological response to impending danger, attention /affection, the need to feel safe, personal instincts reaction, and scientific human evolution theory.
Infants and newborns are naturally vulnerable when hungry, thirsty, have soiled diapers, are sick, or need attention. In their world, they may feel that danger is lurking nearby hence the need to flee. Since they can’t communicate effectively, they cry to tell you what the baby doesn’t want and stop if you do something they like.
Why Do Babies Not Let You Sit Down?
I know how overwhelming it may get when your little one commands you to stand and keep pacing up and down, rock him, and dance to an unknown tune to soothe him.
Sometimes, it seems as if he’s giving you punishment or is just being stubborn, but that’s far from the truth.
The following are possible reasons why a baby may not let you sit down:
1. Babies naturally love being held
Newborns are in a world of discovery. They see new sights and hear different sounds; people, pets, and nature constantly amaze them. Anytime they fear, infants bank on you for comfort and security. And they feel safer when you hold them while moving than sitting down. If your munchkin recently had a vaccination, they may want you to move around while comforting them.
2. Instincts
Newborn babies use instincts to gauge feelings, emotions, and environmental threats. They instinctively know that fleeing from danger could be slower/harder when you’re seated.
According to them, you can move faster while standing, making them feel calm and safe. They’d love you to stay alert and standing, especially when they feel threatened. Interestingly, babies are too young to understand that they are safe, no matter their position.
3. Fight, flight, fright responses
Like adults, the baby’s body has the biological response in case there’s a need to flee from danger. When your baby senses a stressful situation, its body prepares to protect it by sending blood flow to other body parts, including arms, brain, hands, and legs.
Since the baby is too young to flee on its own, he wants you to stay in a better fleeing position – standing. Interestingly, when you stand, they calm down to make it easy when you’re running away from potential danger.
4. Evolution theory
Historically, Homo sapiens lived in the wild full of dangerous animals. The parents would often stay alert, standing and ready to run to protect the children from predators.
If you’re still wondering, “why won’t my baby let me sit down?” this is the same reaction to fear or stress that scientists believe babies have so many years after evolution.
Helpful Tips When Your Baby Won’t Let You Sit Down
You have serious back aches and sore feet because your baby hates it when you sit down. Don’t worry. It’s a phase that will soon pass.
But, is there something you can do to improve the situation?
The following are practical tips every parent should know:
1. Understand your baby’s thought process
First off, understand why your baby won’t let you sit down
Is it hunger, fear, anxiety, or attention? Once you know the cause, you’ll be better positioned to find the best solution.
2. Take a walk outdoors with your munchkin.
Your baby may want some change of environment. Take a walk to the park as you let him enjoy new sights. This will greatly calm him down and give you some time to unwind.
3. Soothe your baby to sleep
Sleep is a form of rest. I know it’s difficult to put a screaming baby to sleep, but keep trying. You may rock him into a nap hence giving him time to re-energize. While he’s sleeping, you can also use the opportunity to relax.
4. Talk to your doula about getting a yoga ball.
Sometimes, the little one only needs to feel movement as a calming response. Your doula may recommend a yoga ball that you can sit and bounce on to create soothing movements similar to ones created while standing.
5. Teach your little one self-independence techniques
As babies develop, they see a parent as the only source of protection and comfort.
Start instilling independence gradually by putting him on the floor for tummy time, minimizing baby-holding time, and taking some time before picking him up when he cries. Independence gradually creates confidence while reducing clinginess.
6. Ask for help
Pacing up and down anytime your baby cries could be overwhelming and stressful. Ask your partner, friend, or other family members for assistance to give you time to rest.
7. Create a support system by joining support groups
Support groups are a great source of encouragement. According to the American psychological association, having strong social support can improve your ability to cope with problems on your own by improving your self-esteem and sense of autonomy.
Joining one – physically or online- during this difficult phase offers you inspiration and gives you real-life ideas from other parents on what to do if the baby wants you standing all the time.
Wrapping Up
Parenting is a journey full of surprises. Your growing baby uses crying to communicate their emotions; if you understand their language, the better for both of you.
Let’s summarize the issue, “my baby won’t let me sit down.”
First, ask yourself “why do babies not want you to sit down?” It may be due to the need for attention/security, instincts, or biological responses.
It can be frustrating to stay standing but don’t panic, as it’s a normal phase that will pass. Asking for help, joining support groups, and taking nature walks are among the things you can do to handle the situation.
If you are still concerned about your baby wanting you to stay on your feet, talk to your pediatrician about it.
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